Oooh i know a bit of french too, monsieur.
Hokay, so. ill try to continue.

Right before the end to my tour of duty, somethin terrible happened. One night while strolling down hamilton, ontario, McRib in hand, i noticed another McRib on the sidewalk. As i went to pick it up it moved! So i went to grab it again, and again it moved. As i continually tried to pick up the McRib i was slowly led into a huge park. Finally i had got the McRib, greatest achievement of my life. Just as i was munchin down i noticed somethin gray off in the distance between some trees, and before i knew i.....

bringing up old memories makes Shook-da-wook sad...