Poll For Men

Do/did you want to get married?

  • Yes

    Votes: 19 47.5%

  • No

    Votes: 21 52.5%
  • Total voters
    40
S

silasraven

Well-Known Member
all ive ever wanted since i was little is to have a wife i can be there for her and make her the happiest woman alive in any way possible.
 
blimey

blimey

Active Member
Lol, I voted yes and I think I tied it back up. I do want to get married, but to a girl that I can call my best friend and my lover. However, I'm somewhat cynical and don't really plan on it happening and don't really take relationships with people seriously.
 
neosapien

neosapien

Well-Known Member
Padawanbater2 said:


Can a married man shed some insight on this? It's like I want to want it, but I don't because it's just too unrealistic these days...
Click to expand...


I would say my wife and I are different from most couples. In a bout every sense of the word. We keep it simple, there's our love for one another and nothing else, and I think thats the key.
 
mantiszn

mantiszn

Well-Known Member
here's something to ponder..
out of the people i know in my life, the happiest families i know are couples (with children) that are not married but have still made a commitment to one other, children do not understand what marriage is, hell i'm an adult and i still don't get it. The only negative is that kids may get picked on.. but 1. it's none of their business.. and 2 it's none of their fucking business..

i think a lot of guys are like me.. in that they don't really give a shit about marriage (not all! but a lot), they look at it as a waste of time and money (more the wedding I guess). I've also noticed that people that feel this way generally seem to come from families that have divorced parents... both men and women

women on the other hand... most of them still have that perfect fairy tale wedding that they've been planning since they were a little girl (again not all, but a lot) pictured in their head...

so again.. I am generalising which is always bad.. but doesn't mean it isn't true.. most men don't give a shit about marriage..but most women do.. as we often live to make her happy.. a lot of people end up married when they don't really want to be.. this often ends in divorce..

the way i look at is.. i DO NOT need a piece of paper to tell me that i am in love with someone.. but if it is something she feels that she needs.. i will support her decision and provide that for her..

the ramblings of an insomniac..

time for another spliff.. :leaf:






Padawanbater2 said:
Exactly how I feel.


Do you guys think marriage has become sort of obsolete? Do you think it would be hard to maintain a relationship with a wife in today's world as a man?

What kinds of benefits are there to having a wife v. not having one? The only real advantage I see is in all intents and purposes, it's somewhat necessary to raise kids in the kind of healthy environment all the experts and most studies indicate, though there are exceptions.

The divorce rate is ridiculous, it's a complete roll of the dice, and with most of us having experienced relationships (in our minds, we thought they'd last forever, THIS is the ONE!) that failed after less than 2 years, it's hard to imagine sticking with someone for LIFE.. as a single guy anyway..

Can a married man shed some insight on this? It's like I want to want it, but I don't because it's just too unrealistic these days...
Click to expand...
 
Padawanbater2

Padawanbater2

Well-Known Member
mantiszn said:
here's something to ponder..
out of the people i know in my life, the happiest families i know are couples (with children) that are not married but have still made a commitment to one other, children do not understand what marriage is, hell i'm an adult and i still don't get it. The only negative is that kids may get picked on.. but 1. it's none of their business.. and 2 it's none of their fucking business..

i think a lot of guys are like me.. in that they don't really give a shit about marriage (not all! but a lot), they look at it as a waste of time and money (more the wedding I guess). I've also noticed that people that feel this way generally seem to come from families that have divorced parents... both men and women

women on the other hand... most of them still have that perfect fairy tale wedding that they've been planning since they were a little girl (again not all, but a lot) pictured in their head...

so again.. I am generalising which is always bad.. but doesn't mean it isn't true.. most men don't give a shit about marriage..but most women do.. as we often live to make her happy.. a lot of people end up married when they don't really want to be.. this often ends in divorce..

the way i look at is.. i DO NOT need a piece of paper to tell me that i am in love with someone.. but if it is something she feels that she needs.. i will support her decision and provide that for her..

the ramblings of an insomniac..

time for another spliff.. :leaf:
Click to expand...
I'm assuming you're married?

It would be nice to have a woman's opinion if she thinks most other women these days want to get married. I believe that's also the case, but I'm not sure, I haven't seen any recent studies on it.

I'm like you, I do not really give a shit about marriage, at all. It seems like a way for a woman to LEGALLY bind you to a relationship, for security purposes. I have a hard time finding a reason for a man to want to engage in that. It simply secures she gets half your shit at the end if it doesn't work out according to plan (and how many things in life do?!)..

What's the guy get out of a marriage?
 
splitphilly

splitphilly

Active Member
I voted no, I'm not against having a life partner, I'm against the divorce rate, and the fact that you need that piece of paper to prove to the state that you and your partner support each other. Also I'm against how the courts recognize the mother as the important factor in a child's life. That's when you start hearing woman say things like "You aren't going to see MY son until I get that check!"

On a slightly different topic, I hate how everyone's all up in arms about how it's a woman's body and it's their choice. Sure a woman might incubate a child, no one ever talks about the male who made that baby possible.


ALSO, woman like to get married for the title, and the event. It's THEIR day, didn't you know that the husband to be has nothing to do with the marriage ceremony? The divorce rate is so terrible because woman won't accept that a marriage is a mutual effort, and cheating men get married so they can keep their cake and have their ice cream too. Life's just to easy for people to work together.

You can feel free to ignore this, I'm someone who believes mothers working is a big problem in this country. Not because I don't believe woman should work, just that being a mother is the most important job a woman with a child will ever have. Sure, a woman could be the bread maker, and the dad can stay at home, but there's nothing like a mothers love. (Unless you're a 13 year old catty girl) I blame our country, not woman.
 
mantiszn

mantiszn

Well-Known Member
nope.. i'm not..
and my gf doesn't want to get married now either.. but not now means someday..
i'm pretty sure i'll spend the rest of my life with her.. we are best friends.. and who wouldn't want to spend the rest of their life with their best friend.. that you get to bump uglies with..

what does the man get out of it.. for me the only thing i would get out of it.. is knowing that i have made her happy.. however I would not do it if it made me unhappy..

prenups are a touchy subject...


checks this shiz out..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage



Padawanbater2 said:
I'm assuming you're married?

It would be nice to have a woman's opinion if she thinks most other women these days want to get married. I believe that's also the case, but I'm not sure, I haven't seen any recent studies on it.

I'm like you, I do not really give a shit about marriage, at all. It seems like a way for a woman to LEGALLY bind you to a relationship, for security purposes. I have a hard time finding a reason for a man to want to engage in that. It simply secures she gets half your shit at the end if it doesn't work out according to plan (and how many things in life do?!)..

What's the guy get out of a marriage?
Click to expand...
 
blimey

blimey

Active Member
mantiszn said:
nope.. i'm not..
and my gf doesn't want to get married now either.. but not now means someday..
i'm pretty sure i'll spend the rest of my life with her.. we are best friends.. and who wouldn't want to spend the rest of their life with their best friend.. that you get to bump uglies with..

what does the man get out of it.. for me the only thing i would get out of it.. is knowing that i have made her happy.. however I would not do it if it made me unhappy..

prenups are a touchy subject...


checks this shiz out..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage
Click to expand...
See in that situation after a couple years I wouldn't mind getting married.
 
splitphilly

splitphilly

Active Member
mantiszn said:
nope.. i'm not..
and my gf doesn't want to get married now either.. but not now means someday..
i'm pretty sure i'll spend the rest of my life with her.. we are best friends.. and who wouldn't want to spend the rest of their life with their best friend.. that you get to bump uglies with..

what does the man get out of it.. for me the only thing i would get out of it.. is knowing that i have made her happy.. however I would not do it if it made me unhappy..

prenups are a touchy subject...


checks this shiz out..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage
Click to expand...

Common law marriage doesn't exist in my state anymore, which is one of the very few true commonwealth states in the country. Meaning I would expect it doesn't exist in most states anymore.
 
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