Tell Me The Most Funniest Sex Incident You Ever Had And I'll Tell You Mine?

i did it in the girls bathroom in a club once... w 2 girls @ once....

college.... those were the days....

k
i will try shit this is what happends wen ur a class clown in school...

Whose done a three way? with another dude and a hot skank?//////
<<<that guy. ... Not Arnold,, well maybe, but me.... Well i couldn't help it. I was trapped into a back seat of a car with a friend from high school. Me and my boy were like hey lets go smoke a blunt and flow( yeah, i used to and i was pretty good). So we were in the back seat of another buddies car with a banging system and this skank shows up. My buddy was like fuck it, let her in. I was chillin and all of a sudden this chick starts bopping both of us... back and forth, back and forth(she was in the middle of us). I remember she tried to come up and kiss me and i almost slapped the hoe.. I looked over to my friend and said hey, i'm gonna finish and you can proceed to the next thing (sex i assume) with her. I busted in her mouth, finished my verse and stepped out the car with the blunt in my hand and went back to the party..... Memories....

7hits of quality acid with the wife + a giving mood + bad timing = my 'redwings' ....... never fully understood the term till I got mine, then it all made sense.... wasnt that funny (to me) at the time, but now we both get a good laugh out of it.

gogrow said:

7hits of quality acid with the wife + a giving mood + bad timing = my 'redwings' ....... never fully understood the term till I got mine, then it all made sense.... wasnt that funny (to me) at the time, but now we both get a good laugh out of it.

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You kicked your wife with your redwings cuz you were fucked up on L?

I would too, but i like to wear the steal toes...

Irollfatties said:

You kicked your wife with your redwings cuz you were fucked up on L?

I would too, but i like to wear the steal toes...

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no...

I ate her pussy, hit the rag, and got the tag.

I was fuckin my ex this one night... funny thing was, we were in between her moms bedroom, the living room with 3 chihuahuas nosin around, and her 13 year old bro was passed out on the couch in the same room... talk about some panic sex

gogrow said:

no...

I ate her pussy, hit the rag, and got the tag.

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If you stay on the clit area after a shower, i've been known to eat it...

dam u guys got some good ones. n i call read them too .... one tym i met the pharmasist at rite aid she was a tiny cute thing i asked her out shit i lived right behind it i always usto c her n e wayz so she brakes up with the boyfriend guess who she calls my my ride is broken the fucken engine i broke a fucken head n e ways he had to be at work at 12 mid night so this girl just plane asked me to fuck her i was like dam that fast? so she lifts up her skirt n moves her panties to the side... i pull mine down one leg has my pants she is all wet i insert ow man she tells me to drive so i do man she is facing me n i cant fucken drive i hit a red light n some fucken dushe bags see us n try to catch up she aint got a top an so i loose them while im in her i pull over n i countinue to bone her she nuts her long nail r diging into my skin it fucken hurts so good she tells me to nut in her im like what she tells me im pregnat? im like fuck it she sead you can form the feet... hahaha.... okay so i do n wen i look at the fucken clock it sead 2:00a.m. ow shit my friend car he had to be at work WOOPS SORRY.... i had to do it ryan you dont understand hahahaha that wasnt my plan.... shit i thought id be home before then shit.....

lol I got my dick sucked in the back of a taxi cab before.The driver was cool with it and everything lol he just kept his eyes on the road.I threw him a 50 for it to.

Fucking snowball

I was pounding that shit from the back, and my dick went in a certain way that made the loudest farting pussy sound ever.

"PppfffferrrrrRRrrrrt!!" said the pussy.

I nearly died.

ganjames said:

I was pounding that shit from the back, and my dick went in a certain way that made the loudest farting pussy sound ever.

"PppfffferrrrrRRrrrrt!!" said the pussy.

I nearly died.

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you must be a young one.... just wait till you hear the sounds that asshole has in store for you

I've never had sounds from the ass.. and my dick has met quite a few assholes.

I experienced the funny sounds long before this incident, but this shit was LOUD!
you probably could have heard this shit down the block.

ganjames said:

I've never had sounds from the ass.. and my dick has met quite a few assholes.

I experienced the funny sounds long before this incident, but this shit was LOUD!
you probably could have heard this shit down the block.

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queefs are funnier when they come after sex.... "you been saving that one?"

I remember one time when i was getting head from my gf and i had to come to a light. A big 18 wheeler pulls up, and i don't wanna tell me chick to stop so I think he'll pass and not look back (I was a little further back from the crossing line and he came up on my right. He gets about 5 feet in front of me and then looks back over his shoulder. All i can see is him pointing and giving a thumbs up......

I throw him a thumbs up and kept on receiving. I was waiting for him to blow the horn or something but that mf kinda stared and then look away...

Man i'm so glad he didn't blew the horn!

gogrow said:

you must be a young one.... Just wait till you hear the sounds that asshole has in store for you

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lfmao!!!!!

lol I came in a couple girls asses only to have me pull out and the nut shoots back out of her and I gotta dodge it like im in the fucking matrix.

One time I shot on this chicks hair, right? Well I started laughing. I wiped her back down still laughing. And plopped over to my side of the bed, leaned back and layed on my gizz. LOL. It hit my pillow and missed her hair. Joke was on me...

im gona tell u one last one okay two k cuz my religion is messing with my head pluss my old ladie gona think im some kinda skank she dont know me like this shit..... shit it just kinda happends girls love to give it up.... what am i gona say NO.... shit i was young..... plus it has been messing with my head im gona get married i dont want to fight over old sex stories well funny one's k gota go to work toda so i dont know if i will b in much today. Construction fucken suck in the SUN......