What would you do

Will Ferrell

Well-Known Member
Wow. Thank you everyone! Idk where to begin. I'm a bit overwhelmed. I've been thinking a lot about yalls comments the past few days and want to reply but I know it will take my ass hours to do.
I'm still on that coaster of emotions.. I've thought that over time I've began to hate my better half. But now it seems a little different. I don't really miss her coming home and us fighting everyday, and her always right about fucking everything. But I noticed now that we're seperated, a few cunts who I thought were my old friends have been extra friendly with her on Facebook lately. And I guess I'm a bit jealous. And I had a dream the other night she told me she was at a party and got fucked in the ass, I woke up all pissed off and wanted to immediately call her on the phone and scream whore! So I'm thinking this means I still obviously care for her. we talked on the phone for almost two hours last night, basically arguing the whole time about any subject that came up, politics mostly..she just knows everything and that's that...drives me crazy. She also was at a little MLK get together/party yesterday and told me some dude offered and smoked a joint with her. That kinda rubbed me the wrong way, but I didn't say anything of course. We have both always been pretty insecure, both coming from horrible long term relationships.. my first gf at 14, dated for 3 years, was probably honestly the biggest whore in Texas. And her first boyfriend use to beat her pretty bad, along with cheat. So it kinda worked out in the beginning, both have trust issues and what not. Sorry now I feel like I'm just rambling. I don't know how to wrap this one up. I really appreciate all yalls help though and will definitely keep y'all updated.
 

Will Ferrell

Well-Known Member
Wow. Thank you everyone! Idk where to begin. I'm a bit overwhelmed. I've been thinking a lot about yalls comments the past few days and want to reply but I know it will take my ass hours to do.
I'm still on that coaster of emotions.. I've thought that over time I've began to hate my better half. But now it seems a little different. I don't really miss her coming home and us fighting everyday, and her always right about fucking everything. But I noticed now that we're seperated, a few cunts who I thought were my old friends have been extra friendly with her on Facebook lately. And I guess I'm a bit jealous. And I had a dream the other night she told me she was at a party and got fucked in the ass, I woke up all pissed off and wanted to immediately call her on the phone and scream whore! So I'm thinking this means I still obviously care for her. we talked on the phone for almost two hours last night, basically arguing the whole time about any subject that came up, politics mostly..she just knows everything and that's that...drives me crazy. She also was at a little MLK get together/party yesterday and told me some dude offered and smoked a joint with her. That kinda rubbed me the wrong way, but I didn't say anything of course. We have both always been pretty insecure, both coming from horrible long term relationships.. my first gf at 14, dated for 3 years, was probably honestly the biggest whore in Texas. And her first boyfriend use to beat her pretty bad, along with cheat. So it kinda worked out in the beginning, both have trust issues and what not. Sorry now I feel like I'm just rambling. I don't know how to wrap this one up. I really appreciate all yalls help though and will definitely keep y'all updated.
Its weird I can read that in a minute, but takes forever to write!
 

hellmutt bones

Well-Known Member
If you just recently have separated after 10+ years. Live in a state with 0 family and friends. Have been cooped up for so long you feel institutionalized.
I've been waking up every day this past month, with absolutely no reason to even get out of bed. Yet I force myself, and try to find something to do... Every day is the same... I'm still trying to quit smoking in hopes that things will get different.
I'm pretty sure I have severe depression. I'm starting to think I may need to commit myself some where. Like a mental hospital or something...can't really afford that though.
I haven't had a job in about two years. My last job was part time at papajohns, bout a year. Before that I had a good job working for a cable company and I was in tech support, you know, the department that everyone loves getting transferred to..was there for a year..my ex and I use to work there together, we both hated it, and just bounced out of there one day. Between the two of us, we had about 10k saved up. So we decided let's move to Albuquerque! I'll get my card and liscense, and grow weed out the ass. She has her bachelor's degree, so we assumed it would be ez for her to find a job, which it was.
Well let me back up even more. I use to have lots of friends. Some might even say I was kinda popular. But when I fell in love, I really didn't even want to hang around anyone else anymore. I guess just wanted to do everything with her..That went well for probably the first four or five years, then life just got dull as fuck! Beyond bored with the same day by day routine, I started secretly smoking weed again( we met in rehab and were trying to take the sober route) it didn't take long before we were both smoking, and smoking a lot..this had lead us/me to being comfortable with not doing anything ever. Just sit around and be stoned outta my mind all day everyday. At first I didn't think it would ever get old. But now here I Am. Whenever I'm at home, I wish I was out doing something fun, but when I'm out, all I can think about is getting back home.... Literally nothing excites me anymore it seems. I honestly think if I had enough money to go out and buy a Lamborghini, I would just let it sit in the garage. Nothing sounds fun....
So everyday I wake up motivated to not smoke weed, hopeing for a change, but every evening, I end up giving in. For some reason, when it starts getting dark, that's when I want to smoke the most, cause I think, well the days already over, I can take a hit and be ok, or I can continue to try and stay sober, and basically go crazy.
Also, I've heard this time and time again. When I was very young and first started to smoke, it was awsome, I loved to go out and do stupid shit with my friends. Now it the opposite.. horrible anxiety. I literally can't step out the house or talk to anyone besides my ex if I'm high. I guess I always thought if I smoke enough of it, it will eventually get back to the way it was, but that doesn't seem to be the case. It just been getting worse every year.
Ugh, and here I am, spent at least an hour writing this, and for what.. Will I get something out of it? Probably not..what could I possibly get out of it? I don't see how any advice can help my situation.. I guess it's just good to get some of this stuff out...
Usually this is about the time i start jerking off alot. Also start visualizing that ur gonna meet a girl that ur beating off to.
That usually motivates me to start dieting and working out, and sure enough i find a broad! Then i get lazy and complacent and get all outta shape and rhe cycle starts again.
 

Will Ferrell

Well-Known Member
I have been drinking a lot more lately... Stiff screwdriver every morning. Helps me relax when making a deal. Sober/high me = awkward. Buzzed/ drunk me = coolest mofo around.. and I go home, sober up, and depression kicks in...
Ugh that sounds like I'm welcoming a pity party.. that's not my intention.. I think..

Today I'm going to to drop off a sack, then either go to the store and stock up on groceries, or casino for a no limit Holden tournament.. if anxiety doesn't kick in too bad.
 
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theslipperbandit

Well-Known Member
Delete her n those tools off Facebook n block her aswell.she obviously knows that the sharing a spliff with another guy would piss you off so she's just being a cow n trying to get under your skin so cut down on contact with her unless it's genuinely necessary. Drink isn't good man.
 

mr sunshine

Well-Known Member
I have been drinking a lot more lately... Stiff screwdriver every morning. Helps me relax when making a deal. Sober/high me = awkward. Buzzed/ drunk me = coolest mofo around.. and I go home, sober up, and depression kicks in...
Ugh that sounds like I'm welcoming a pity party.. that's not my intention.. I think..

Today I'm going to to drop off a sack, then either go to the store and stock up on groceries, or casino for a no limit Holden tournament.. if anxiety doesn't kick in too bad.
When I'm anxious I snort coke. Seems to help. Have you tried yoga?
 

hellmutt bones

Well-Known Member
I have been drinking a lot more lately... Stiff screwdriver every morning. Helps me relax when making a deal. Sober/high me = awkward. Buzzed/ drunk me = coolest mofo around.. and I go home, sober up, and depression kicks in...
Ugh that sounds like I'm welcoming a pity party.. that's not my intention.. I think..

Today I'm going to to drop off a sack, then either go to the store and stock up on groceries, or casino for a no limit Holden tournament.. if anxiety doesn't kick in too bad.
U need to get a different profession because from what i remember uve had some bad runnings with some bad mofo. So of course ur gonna have anxiety and thats what leads to drinking. U just need to change everything and start fresh. But its easier said than done.
 

Kind Sir

Well-Known Member
here, try these
DHEA 50mg once a day
ubiquinol 200mg, NOT coq10, that's not nearly absorbable
Omega oils, and vitamin e
a good multivitamin, I like rainbow light
FORCE yourself to do a workout, preferably one like lifting weights, as not only will you get a lil buzz from the THC in your fat, but you get a lil endorphin too, als you'll firm up quickly too, and that's always good for self-esteem.
If you do that for a month, i'm certain you'll feel better, and at the least you'd look better.
DON"T wake n bake, and DON"t smoke during the day, use marijuana as a "reward" for when you are doing shit you should, like working out...
besides a bongload after a hard workout gets you BLASSSTED
Trust me.
Been there.
had a 13yr relationship combust over the course of 4 hrs, with no prior notice.

Get laid man... That'll help.

trust me, depression is ALL about your perspective, imagine ALS or cancer, or whatever..
However shitty your day is? it could be much MUCH worse..
hell even a good toothache will show you some appreciation..

Nothing you are doing is wrong, a "wound" like that doesn't heal over night.
the bandages should be working out, vitamins, and getting laid.
In that order, work out three times a week and in a week you'll FEEL sexier.
Knock the dust off your dick man... he's like a muscle... you don't use it? he'll hate you and atrophy...
Not asking what happened, but dam four hours. Couldnt imagine.
 

dannyboy602

Well-Known Member
I guess it's just good to get some of this stuff out...
I knew I was reading a rant but I read it all anyway. Here's my honest opinion. You have some depression issues. So does half the population.
You lack motivation and you need some discipline. Plan your week ahead of time and keep to a schedule.
Do you even lift bro? Working out will help with the depression and it'll also improve your sex life which is again, good for the depression.
Get outside everyday. Go to the store. Walk around the fucking block. The minute you remove yourself from your immediate environment your head clears and your sense of perspective changes. You've introduced a little chaos into a fairly predictable day.
When people talk about stress its usually in terms of too much stress and the diseases that come with it. No one ever talks about having too little stress but I think that might be part of the problem for you Will. Think about it.
 

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
Wow. Thank you everyone! Idk where to begin. I'm a bit overwhelmed. I've been thinking a lot about yalls comments the past few days and want to reply but I know it will take my ass hours to do.
I'm still on that coaster of emotions.. I've thought that over time I've began to hate my better half. But now it seems a little different. I don't really miss her coming home and us fighting everyday, and her always right about fucking everything. But I noticed now that we're seperated, a few cunts who I thought were my old friends have been extra friendly with her on Facebook lately. And I guess I'm a bit jealous. And I had a dream the other night she told me she was at a party and got fucked in the ass, I woke up all pissed off and wanted to immediately call her on the phone and scream whore! So I'm thinking this means I still obviously care for her. we talked on the phone for almost two hours last night, basically arguing the whole time about any subject that came up, politics mostly..she just knows everything and that's that...drives me crazy. She also was at a little MLK get together/party yesterday and told me some dude offered and smoked a joint with her. That kinda rubbed me the wrong way, but I didn't say anything of course. We have both always been pretty insecure, both coming from horrible long term relationships.. my first gf at 14, dated for 3 years, was probably honestly the biggest whore in Texas. And her first boyfriend use to beat her pretty bad, along with cheat. So it kinda worked out in the beginning, both have trust issues and what not. Sorry now I feel like I'm just rambling. I don't know how to wrap this one up. I really appreciate all yalls help though and will definitely keep y'all updated.
Me and my husband had huge communication problems the first several years. Little by little we approached each other and spoke to each other from a place of love and it got better.

Feelings need to be expressed rather than anger. Words need to be calmly stated vs yelled. All that makes a huge difference.
 

SamsonsRiddle

Well-Known Member
Not to start anything, but he's depressed, reading the bible isn't going to help that...
How many "feel-good" stories are in there?
Nevermind,, i'm not the person to reply on this.

Why do religion and guns seem to be parallel?
Just my observation anyways...
And when someone is talking about this much depression mentioning guns is sorta, um... well... not the most tactful.
BUT I don't know shit
I wasn't trying to give him feel-good stories or i would have suggested some idiot like joel osteen. Reading the bible every day is giving your life a purpose, and a step in the right direction of finding a meaning beyond just this life. At least if you start a relationship with god you don't have to worry about all the things you do with anyone in this life. He knows all your thought, problems, all that shit so you can come to him boldly, stating how you really feel.

All you have to do is try it, only have to give up some time and do 1 chapter a day. Really not that hard.
 

MonkeyGrinder

Well-Known Member
I'll avoid a huge Tldr and just say I was pretty much right in your shoes. I pretty much went full blown hermit for close to 2 years by the end of it.
Time for some man talk.
I want to say first and foremost that you need to break contact with the ex. You've pretty much built your life totally around her. The hard part is that she's no longer a driving force now. So treat it like a band aid that's been stuck on there for too long. Just rip that sucker off and forget about it. Other people have stated your ex knows your see that shit. And she does. If she had any consideration for you she would have made it invisible to you. You CAN do that on fb with a single click. And as far as the asshats on FB are concerned don't even freaking worry about it or being jealous for that matter. As soon as a Woman switches her status to single you'll notice at least several dudes immediately hit the stupid ass like button. Then their inbox gets blown up by a good 1/4 of the dudes on their list playing support roles. These are the skeevy fuckers who didn't have the balls to try and step in while you were around. If they were YOUR friends as well then take that as a lesson in who your friends really are. Few things on the planet will motivate dudes to betray their buds. Money is one and pussy happens to be the other. Cut them out as well. Orbiters are generally spineless people and weak kneed.

Second.
A healthy body will lead to a healthy mind. You need to get on that asap. On top of the physical benefits it'll also keep your mind off from the bs with your ex while your working out. It can be as simple as joining a gym or you can go with a basic weight bench. If you don't feel like spending a fortune then you can pick up a basic bench at Walmart for like 70-80 bucks. Get a bench bar, a 2 handed curl bar and 2 dumbells. Grab enough weights to use all of them.
Do this every other day.
After that bust out reps of benching, curls and butterfly curls. You don't have to kill yourself at first and try to bust out 4 full sets of each one right off the start. That'll just lead to you getting torn muscles and not wanting to move for a week. Just make sure to work your way up to it. Put together a gain chart to keep tabs on where you are and where you need to go. Just get through your NUMBER of sets. If you can't finish one then switch to another after a very short break. 2 minutes works just fine.
If you hit actual muscle failure then just stop right there.
After your day of rest then go through your sets again. Take note of the number of reps you've done on your previous workout. Increase your number of reps/set by 1 or 2. You actually shouldn't have any issue doing this at all. Rinse and repeat until you hit your target rep numbers per set. THEN start to increase the weight if you feel the need.
This will give you something positive and you'll gain progress each time you finish. Not to mention drop fat AND gain muscle mass, strength and endurance. You just have to push yourself to do it. Not excuses if/when you start.
On your lifting rest days bust out some cardio. Find a track if you can. If not then you can use sidewalks and streets. Figure out a 2 mile trip. On your first trip jog a 1/4 mile from the start. Finish off the rest walking. Every return trip increase the distance you jog by an 1/8th or 1/4 mile. But always increase it. Always finish off with at least a half mile walk for a slow cooldown. Even if you're going over the original 2 mile mark.
In a month you should be able to finish off both with no problem.

Third
Find yourself a job. Anything will do. It'll give you some stability. You'll meet new people. You might even make a new friend or 2. Not to mention you could find a new patient or 2 that likes your meds. When it comes to this you might actually wanna stop smoking dope entirely or at least cut it down to a "reward" for a productive day that's entirely finished. That is after you've finished off going to work AND working out + tweaking your grow room. Ideally you should probably cut it down to less than that since from what I've read personally I think you're using it as a coping mechanism now.
So focus on your body, your business and your grow. You'll drop pounds, get pretty ripped and then start stacking back some cash. Everything else will fall into place. All you have to do is put the bowl down and get down to it. You've pretty much hit rock bottom. You can only go up from there.

Then the next thing you know you'll run into your ex while you have a hotty in tow that's a decade younger than her.
 

greasemonkeymann

Well-Known Member
Not asking what happened, but dam four hours. Couldnt imagine.
What happened?
ok
short story
The night before, I cooked her food, gave her a massage, we fucked like rabbits (always had good sex)
The next morning I was going to my shop, said
"I love you hon"
she said
"love you more"
Then I left shop early, around 12pm, came home, all her shit was packed away (as well as some of my shit), and she was on the phone and crying when I got there, I asked what was wrong, thinking we got evicted or something weird.
nope.
She had just turned 30 yrs old and thought she should have had a kid and a family by then, so she left.
After 13 yrs and NEVER fighting or disagreeing or anything. and I was a damn good boyfriend, believe me there, I know how to treat the ladies in that regard..
8 months later she was married.
There wasn't a guy, cuz we tried to "try" to make it work after she moved, but nah...
but in 8 months there was a guy then..
So yeah.
That was yrs ago so it's all good now, but that bitch CRUSHED me... and I thought I was invincible.
All I could do for like two yrs was tap as much ass as I could... which was a LOT...
but it didn't help.
Only time heals shit like that
 

greasemonkeymann

Well-Known Member
I wasn't trying to give him feel-good stories or i would have suggested some idiot like joel osteen. Reading the bible every day is giving your life a purpose, and a step in the right direction of finding a meaning beyond just this life. At least if you start a relationship with god you don't have to worry about all the things you do with anyone in this life. He knows all your thought, problems, all that shit so you can come to him boldly, stating how you really feel.

All you have to do is try it, only have to give up some time and do 1 chapter a day. Really not that hard.
I've read the bible a WHOLE lot, I was raised Baptist/protestant.
church 3x a week, and "youth" on Tuesdays for 3 hrs..
Till I was old enough to read about science, then it all went out the window.
there are some good parables and philosophies in there, but for the most part it wasn't applicable to my way of logic.
 
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