What did you accomplish today?

tyler.durden said:

Nah, she's out of town. But, I'm glad that I didn't. All night this curvy, young server knew all my tunes and was singing and bopping along. When I was done, she asked if I was hungry, and I was. She brought me a large plate of wings with the best hot sauce I've had in years. Fucking delicious. She then asked if I wanted a drink, and I said scotch neat. She brought that over, I downed it, and she asked if I wanted another. I said, 'only if you have one with me.' She giggled and said she can't drink yet, but she got off at midnight. That was 3 hours from then, yikes. I told her I was back tomorrow, and she said, 'Great! I'm off at 9pm tomorrow. We can have drinks then.' I almost got a chubby. Then I thought, what the fuck am I doing??? She's way too young for me, and I'm trying to get a regular gig here. Do I really want to start off by shitting where I eat? She's so cute that if I can smash, I just may. Fuck this gig. That's stupid. Lord, help me make the right decision...

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Singlemalt said:

And the Lord saith "verily, verily, I say unto thee: Do eeeeet!"

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raratt said:

Do they have a rule of no dating other employees? Is she related to the owner? Who says you can't have your cake...

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tyler.durden said:

Lol! Dude, you are no help. You're like the devil on my left shoulder.



Man, you are not helping, either. You know how it is - we'll fuck a few times, she finds out who I really am and starts to hate me. I dump her, she's pissed at work and talks shit about me, the boss doesn't like the tension because of this asshole musician that fucked this girl almost half his age. Plus, he always wanted to fuck her. Fuck this guy. Bye. Well, I fucked that up in record time. Where is the fucking angel on my right shoulder??? I haven't seen him in years...

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tyler.durden said:

Lord, help me make the right decision..

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ANC said:

You praying to your dick again?

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doublejj said:

after putting nearly 200 miles on my DIY electric Schwinn trike I have upgraded to this 'Fat Tire' electric trike....30mph and 50miles of range....
Should be here Monday, I'll post pics

View attachment 4479919

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tyler.durden said:

Fat tire bikes are fun, but there's a LOT more resistance. Eats up the battery faster. But on the bright side, you should get more of a workout. Looking forward to the pics...

P.S. Are those lithium batteries or lead acid?

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doublejj said:

after putting nearly 200 miles on my DIY electric Schwinn trike I have upgraded to this 'Fat Tire' electric trike....30mph and 50miles of range....
Should be here Monday, I'll post pics

View attachment 4479919

Click to expand...

tyler.durden said:

Nah, she's out of town. But, I'm glad that I didn't. All night this curvy, young server knew all my tunes and was singing and bopping along. When I was done, she asked if I was hungry, and I was. She brought me a large plate of wings with the best hot sauce I've had in years. Fucking delicious. She then asked if I wanted a drink, and I said scotch neat. She brought that over, I downed it, and she asked if I wanted another. I said, 'only if you have one with me.' She giggled and said she can't drink yet, but she got off at midnight. That was 3 hours from then, yikes. I told her I was back tomorrow, and she said, 'Great! I'm off at 9pm tomorrow. We can have drinks then.' I almost got a chubby. Then I thought, what the fuck am I doing??? She's way too young for me, and I'm trying to get a regular gig here. Do I really want to start off by shitting where I eat? She's so cute that if I can smash, I just may. Fuck this gig. That's stupid. Lord, help me make the right decision...

Click to expand...

tyler.durden said:

Nah, she's out of town. But, I'm glad that I didn't. All night this curvy, young server knew all my tunes and was singing and bopping along. When I was done, she asked if I was hungry, and I was. She brought me a large plate of wings with the best hot sauce I've had in years. Fucking delicious. She then asked if I wanted a drink, and I said scotch neat. She brought that over, I downed it, and she asked if I wanted another. I said, 'only if you have one with me.' She giggled and said she can't drink yet, but she got off at midnight. That was 3 hours from then, yikes. I told her I was back tomorrow, and she said, 'Great! I'm off at 9pm tomorrow. We can have drinks then.' I almost got a chubby. Then I thought, what the fuck am I doing??? She's way too young for me, and I'm trying to get a regular gig here. Do I really want to start off by shitting where I eat? She's so cute that if I can smash, I just may. Fuck this gig. That's stupid. Lord, help me make the right decision...

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Bobby schmeckle said:

View attachment 4479854
painted this.

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doublejj said:

after putting nearly 200 miles on my DIY electric Schwinn trike I have upgraded to this 'Fat Tire' electric trike....30mph and 50miles of range....
Should be here Monday, I'll post pics

View attachment 4479919

Click to expand...

Bareback said:

Does my bacon look like little penis’s to y’all View attachment 4480037

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ANC said:

there goes the exercise out eh window

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tyler.durden said:

Lol! Dude, you are no help. You're like the devil on my left shoulder.



Man, you are not helping, either. You know how it is - we'll fuck a few times, she finds out who I really am and starts to hate me. I dump her, she's pissed at work and talks shit about me, the boss doesn't like the tension because of this asshole musician that fucked this girl almost half his age. Plus, he always wanted to fuck her. Fuck this guy. Bye. Well, I fucked that up in record time. Where is the fucking angel on my right shoulder??? I haven't seen him in years...

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raratt said:

I'd eat that (the bacon part, not the other).

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curious2garden said:

Thank you Tyler for making me appreciate how easy my life is without having to penis wrangle.

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